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The Headache & The Party

The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by her not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early, decided to go to the party. As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume, cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice "chick" he could and copping a lit tle feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her. She let him go as far as he Wished, naturally, since he was her husband. After more drinks he finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had passionate sex in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had. "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked,"Did you dance much?" He replied, I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys,so we went into the spare room
and played poker all evening." You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker all night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm. To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your brother, apparently he
had the time of his life.

Vacation Request Form

More and more employers are now only accepting your vacation request form on line.

We have enclosed a copy of it so you don't have to go looking for it. Some employers just don't realize not everyone has MS Power Point on their computers. CLICK HERE

Inspired By the Laugh Doctor

I hope no one takes offence to the jokes on this page. We all need to lighten up and be less serious. Blood Pressure comes down, Family and Friend relationships go up. I was inspired to do this by Dr. Clifford Kuhn, M.D. The Laugh Doctor
His web site is http://www.natural-humor-medicine.com/
I recommend subscribing to his newsletter and read the excerpt from his book HERE

Dis-Claimer: There are a long list of resources on his web site none are currently endorsed or evaluated by the Venture Quest Health Network.

Stinky Curtain Rods

Woman catches her husband Cheating
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and
deposited a few half-eaten shrimp tail shells dipped in caviar into
The hollow of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband
returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.
Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during
which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even
paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house.The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half,
They could not find a buyer for their stinky house.

Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely
and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed
On a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been
Worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.
She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the
paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
Watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........
And to spite the ex-wife, the girlfriend even took the curtain rods.